Yes, everything is ‘looking up’ right now. No, I don’t really having any big complaints. Yes, I am a little nervous about traveling overseas in about a month. Is that enough reason to be depressed? I’ll tell you what: I don’t need a reason to be depressed. It just happens. And, unfortunately the unique cycle of my particular depression usually has me down during this time of year. It’s a bit odd, isn’t it? The majority of people I’ve spoken with associate depression with winter and a lack of sunlight.
It frustrated me greatly when a friend asked me what I had to be depressed about. You see, I have Bipolar Disorder, and have been coping with this illness since I was 16 (I am 38 now). Bipolar depression doesn’t require a reason for depression to occur. For me, these days it mostly manifests itself as extreme fatigue, going to bed at 6:30 pm (if I can make it that long), not having the energy to attend to my activities of daily living (ADLs), and more.
Don’t get me wrong, there is a type of depression called Atypical Depression, which is strongly influenced by external events. However, Bipolar Depression can creep up on one whenever it wants. And I need medication to help manage it. Unfortunately, I may feel depressed — even suicidal— when everything is seemingly fantastic.
No, I am not trying to ‘jump down your throat’ regarding this mistake you’ve made regarding my illness. But I would like you to realize that you, or anybody or anything else are not at fault or causing this period of depression. I only ask for your support and understanding.